i'm trying to fall asleep so i can wake up in time to meet baby.
but nope i'm not sleepy at all.
i'm contemplating sleeping pills.
rahhhs...!

i've been surfing blogs to pass time.
blogs that i've never been to since ages ago.
and it amazes me how much updates and changes there have been in their lives.
someone whom used to be so close to me.
i'm really glad she's happy.
and she found the courage to do all that she dreamt of.
while mine just fall to pieces.
the moment we parted ways, they ceased to exist.

or rather, i formed new ones.
new ideals, a new kinda life.
i really do wonder how it would have been like if things were different.
not that i'm unhappy with the current one.
i'm glad i had made the decisions, that eventually led me to my baby.
and after so long, i'm breathing and feeling once more.
no longer, choked by bitterness and anger and tears.

letting you go has been so damn hard.
but someone new came in.
and i'm thankful that you left.
because i've found someone who made me happier than you did.
she fills up the void you left behind so easily.
and i've never been more in love than i did before.

you were just a beautiful accident.
much as i was hurt, you taught me alot.
but i would not want to see us drawing open new wounds anymore.
what's gone, is behind us.
so i guess we will just remain as "the very sensitive person" to be mentioned.

and baby, thank you.
if not for you, i would never have closed this bitter chapter of my life.
you're my new beginning.
my sunshine, my love.

- evan